J.D. Moyer

sci-fi author, beatmaker

How to Deal with Your Whiteness

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On November 10

In Culture Rants/Shares, Politics

Trump was elected because of whites. He was almost reelected because of whites.

“Rural” voters supported Trump, as did “working class” voters. But those are codes for white rural voters and white working class voters. African-American rural and working class voters didn’t support Trump. Asian-American rural and working class voters didn’t support the “kung-flu” president either.

Trump ran on whiteness and was nearly reelected on whiteness. His language regarding the “greatness” of America was code for a white-dominated America protecting itself against non-white foreigners. Given multiple opportunities, he consistently refused to denounce white supremacy.

Despite his utter incompetence, open racism, misogyny, and catastrophic mishandling of the pandemic, Trump won the majority of the white vote. Again. Whites, as a group, failed to denounce Trump and all that he stands for.

White people, including white liberals such as myself who didn’t vote for Trump and spoke out against for him for four years, have a problem. And that problem is whiteness itself, and our stubborn, overly sensitive refusal to acknowledge and deal with it.

Triggered

Are you triggered, being referred to as part of the white voting bloc? I know I am. I want to be seen as an individual. I don’t want to take responsibility for the collective actions of my broad cultural category. Why should I? I didn’t vote for Trump. I hate the guy and everything he stands for.

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Remembering to Be Emotionally Non-Reactive (Electric Hot Tub Emergency)

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On October 26

In Mental Health, Metaprogramming

Not our house, not our hot tub.

My wife and daughter really wanted a hot tub. Eventually they convinced me. And with all the money we’ve saved by not traveling or eating out during the pandemic, we could afford it.

There were two dozen things that needed to happen in the back yard before we could put in the hot tub. An old trellis needed removing. Some post holes needed to be filled with concrete. A fence needed repairing.

Eventually we completed all these tasks as a family. The hot tub arrived. Our electrician installed it.

And it didn’t work. It turned on but it didn’t heat up. Instead of a hot tub we just had a tub.

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Mental Health Plan for Wildfires-Pandemic-Trumpocalypse

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On September 10

In Mental Health

Here in Oakland, more people live on the streets than ever, many of them mentally ill. California is on fire. Our president is a narcissist criminal huckster leveraging his office for profit and destroying the best of our institutions and the environment before he goes down in flames himself. Covid-19 is on track to kill at least a million people worldwide, 20% of those deaths in the U.S.

The world is a dumpster fire.

And yet I feel pretty good.

Over the past few years I’ve developed my mental health plan into a smoothly functioning, robust, anti-fragile system that buoys my mood and protects me from the worst symptoms of depression and anxiety. Of course I’m still vulnerable to the stress of unexpected and negative events, but I’ve learned a lot from weathering a few chronic health conditions, illness and death in the family, job insecurity, parenting difficulties, and all the bullshit mentioned in the first paragraph.

Here’s my current plan, for what it’s worth. Maybe it will help you develop your own system to address your crushing anxiety, dread, and depression.

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Nostalgia

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On August 28

In Culture Rants/Shares

Lately I’ve been taking a megatrip down memory lane over on the new Qoöl Instagram, sorting through the bazillions of snapshots taken from the heyday of my clubbing past life in the late 90’s and 2000’s.

Were we happier back then? Maybe, maybe not. I remember joyful nights and great friendships but also stressful times and some not-so-great decisions. Most of us (not everyone) made it through and are now thriving.

I used to regard nostalgia with suspicion, but I’ve revised my view. Part of that is just getting older and realizing that I have as much of my life behind me as in front of me (if I’m lucky). But looking back is important even for young people. Our identities are formed from our experiences, and if we don’t examine those experiences, we don’t understand ourselves. The past is just as important as the future.

And looking back is important for hope, especially now. We looked carefree because we were young, but also because the world wasn’t quite as on fire as it is now (here in California, literally). Those fires will burn themselves out, as will our current tyrannical government and the hatred, fear, and stupidity that consumes our nation.

Hopefully sooner rather than later.

Luck is the Opposite of Efficiency

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On July 13

In Lifestyle Experiments, Metaprogramming

I have a repeating to-do item in my Todoist: do something to increase luck.

To remind myself of the things I can do to get more lucky, I include the following subcategories:

  • Do something nice/kind
  • Meet someone new
  • Show up (purposefully vague)
  • Bring someone up (signal boost, advise, or otherwise help someone with less power than myself)
  • Put myself or my work out there (submit something, publicly speak up, etc.)

Those subcategories have evolved somewhat since I first performed my 30-day luck experiment. I’ve picked items that mesh well with my personality and that are easily actionable.

Some people do these things naturally everyday without a second thought. But I’ve had to train myself, and I still consider myself a luck beginner.

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